Charles Griffin
ENG 102
Professor Michael Benton
Training
to Come Home
War
is something the military is very good at because we as human beings have been
in different variations of war since the beginning of time. Since then we have
gone from using stones and sinew from animals to developing, creating and
innovating the most sophisticated weapon systems imaginable and to enable
soldiers to use them. We are good at making war and we are good at making
soldiers fight these wars, yet when we consider the experience of the modern
day combat veteran we start to see that we have not been as good at preparing
them to come home. Why is that? Well, the generations before ours lived
immersed in conflict and they fought right where they lived. So, until only
recently during America’s revolutionary history, there was hardly a need to
learn how to come home from war because we had never needed to before. That’s
not really the case anymore. Since the revolutionary war from 1861-1865 we
haven’t fought on American soil unless you consider the attack on Pearl Harbor
December 7, 1941 a war or conflict fought on U.S. soil. America’s
unpreparedness to return soldiers home from conflict without proper reintegration
and training is resulting in many soldiers with PTSD suffering from the effects
of untreated mental illness. It is imperative that the American government
provide soldiers with proper reintegration tools after they return home from
war, because the government has a responsibility to give soldiers the best
chance of a normal life after conflict.
The
military is great at training soldiers to harness rage. A rage that most people
don’t realize they have, in combat that rage kept me alive as a soldier in the
military, at home that rage almost killed me. Before 2009, I had never been
west of Kentucky but often wondered about life outside a small town. I really
wanted to be a part of something I wanted to show my worth. January 2009, I
enlisted into the army with hopes of going to war and fulfilling my childhood
fantasies of participating in combat and having that bond of brotherhood. From
day one in basic training, we were broken down mentally through “smoke sessions”:
multiple exercises lasting past muscle fatigue of one soldier or group of
soldiers, and reminded at all times we knew nothing, we were nothing, and all
life experience up to the point of joining the military was irrelevant. This was
the process of building soldiers, by hardening both the mind and body until
feelings was something unnoticed, we continued this process until we became desensitized.
The military fosters a sense of brotherhood, but also benefits from enforcing
the idea that killing the enemy is of upmost importance. We were taught many call
and responses that were directly linked with violence, where most people would
answer a question with yes or no, we used phrases like “kill” which means yes
with a high level of enthusiasm. When the drill sergeants ask if we were
motivated the direct answer given back with no hesitation was always “Motivated.
Motivated. Hell yeah, motivated! Ooh, ahh, I want to kill somebody! Ooh, ahh I
want to kill somebody! Ahhhhh!” If the drill sergeant didn’t like it we yelled it again. Another one belted
out daily on multiple occasions was: “What makes the grass grow green? Blood
blood bright red blood ahhhhhh!” As we made our way through the chow line we
were asked: “What are the two types of people in this world?” We replied with, “the
quick and the dead!” Which one are you? “The quick!” Who are they? “The dead!”
The military uses hundreds of these call and response chants, with the purpose
of creating and channeling hype and aggression. Enemy personnel are targets or
silhouettes, these are also terms we become very familiar with, soldiers never
use terms like “person,” “man,” “woman,” or “child” because those terms have
emotion attached to them, which could cause hesitation or confusion with a
decision to take a life. Any training covering the concepts of coming home and
dealing with direct death would have been valuable and useful because we were
heading to war.
It
wasn’t until I was deployed to Afghanistan in support of Operation Enduring
Freedom that I came to realize that war, true war is not at all a childhood
fantasy or anything close to it. One of the most traumatic things a soldier can
experience is Harm to others, even the enemy. In a survey taken after the first
Gulf War by David Marlowe, an anthropologist, combat veterans reported that
killing an enemy soldier, or being a witness to one being killed, was worse
than being wounded themselves, but the worst thing of all was losing a buddy
(Junger 82). It only took one day to transform me from a normal functioning
young man into a mere shadow of the boy who left home seeking out an adventure
and some form of belonging, after my best friend died as a result from an IED
(improvised explosive device). After returning home from Afghanistan in 2013, I
self-medicated with alcohol, went through a divorce, and literally lost
everything I owned besides my military clothes/gear and a military duffle bag
of civilian clothing, along with a few personal belongings. Nightmares and
flashbacks of the firefights, explosions and cries of my friends consumed me
and I sank into severe depression, feeling like I was the only one going
through this. It wasn’t until reaching the point of attempting suicide and
luckily failing that I decided to approach my chain of command and ask for
help. One of my closest friends only a week later hanged himself. He didn’t get
the help he needed in time. This was a real wakeup call to me that I wasn’t
alone.
One
issue that the VA and military has with helping veterans and soldiers is that
there isn’t enough doctors for the amount of veterans and soldiers seeking help
(Oppel Jr. and Goodnough). “Suicide is often seen as an extreme expression of
PTSD, but researchers have not yet found any relationship between suicide and
combat.” (Junger 83). With that being said for an average of twenty veterans a
day committing suicide, waiting is not an option (Shane III and Kime). Veterans
seeking treatment will more than likely receive two forms of therapy. The first
is cognitive behavioral therapy and the second is prolonged exposure therapy.
After doing both of these I must admit that the difference these treatments
made was significant. Little did I know in January 2017, I would be medically
retired/discharged from the army for multiple injuries to my back, shoulder,
severe anxiety and depression, and PTSD.
PTSD
is extremely common among service members who have seen combat. The VA defines
PTSD as ‘the development of characteristic and persistent symptoms along with
difficulty functioning after exposure to a life-threatening experience or to an
event that either involves a threat to life or serious injury.’ In addition to
military combat, PTSD can result from the experience or witnessing of a terrorist
attack, violent crime and abuse, natural disasters, serious accidents, or
violent personal assaults. (Reisman).
According
to Matthew J. Friedman, MD, PhD, Senior Advisor and former Executive Director,
National Center for PTSD, Links between the trauma of war and post-military
civilian life were established around 1980. Until recent years, the science of
PTSD just wasn’t there. Friedman goes on to say that in the fiscal year of 2013
more than 500,000 soldiers were treated for PTSD and were receiving treatment
at VA facilities across America. Prior to this society didn’t know what to do
for veterans suffering from PTSD. Some would be heavily medicated and some just
told to go home and forget about their experiences. More recently methods like
therapy dogs, and wilderness retreats have been used to treat PTSD. I have
participated in many of these treatment facilities and activities including
white water rafting, rock climbing with Wounded Warrior, sky diving, and deep
sea fishing to name a few. The problem with these sorts of treatments are that
they may temporarily relive stress, but don’t target the actual PTSD along with
its symptoms. Things have changed though and through new scientific studies it
is shown that soldiers with PTSD can manage those symptoms through repetitive
training. It is shown that the best treatments for PTSD actually use the same
training principals that the military uses to train its soldiers for war
(Garcia et al.).
When
the United States decides to go to war with another country we now have the
technology to tailor the training that soldiers undergo according to the enemy and
terrain that they will be fighting in, and then drop them in to fight anywhere
on the globe. When they’re done we simply jet them back to normal every day
civilian life. Just imagine for a moment what this must feel like. One day I’m
in a five hour firefight in Afghanistan and only seven days later I’m in a
hospital meeting my son for the first time carrying diapers, baby wipes, and
formula instead of a rifle, C4, and an MRE (meal ready to eat). There’s a term
veterans use for things that cannot be explained with words but only the
experience itself can explain, and that’s “mindfuck.” While we spend countless
hours training for war we have only recently come to understand that soldiers
also require training on how to return to civilian life.
In
the army, we don’t simply hand a soldier a Browning .50 cal, show them the
trigger, hand them some ammo, and expect that all will turn out well. No. The
military meticulously trains soldiers until proficiency is achieved. This
training occurs over and over and over again until lifting a weapon and
engaging a target is so ingrained into muscle memory that it is performed
without even thinking, even under stressful scenarios and conditions. This same
concept of training is also true with PTSD according to Hector Garcia a
clinical psychologist specializing in PTSD. The first of these treatments is
cognitive behavioral therapy Which is kind of a mental recalibration. Garcia
explains, “When veterans come home from war their way of mentally framing the
world is calibrated to an immensely more dangerous environment. So when you try
to overlay that mind frame onto a peacetime environment, you get problems,” (Garcia).
Soldiers returning home with PTSD seem to go through a very common trend,
drowning in worries and dangers that don’t actually exist, loosing trust in
those closest to them including family members. This is not to say there aren’t
dangers in the land of the free and home of the brave, because there most
certainly are, but the chances of encountering them compared to that of, let’s
say, Afghanistan are astronomically lower.
As
Garcia mentions prolonged exposure therapy is the fastest of the evidence
based, effective treatments for reintegrating. Prolonged exposure treatment was
the treatment that I chose. The treatment began with exercises which were more
like challenges. To many, these challenges would be simple everyday common
errands but for me I found them to almost unbearable. For example, going to a
grocery store, shopping mall, or going to a restaurant and setting with my back
to the door. Staying in these environments not allowing myself to leave when
the overwhelming feeling of anxiety and not having full control was extremely
difficult. At first I was very anxious, I wanted to sit where I could scan the
entire room and have more than one exit readily available. I wanted to leave
but I didn’t. I remembered my training and I kept moving through my discomfort
and every time I did the anxiety and panic came down a little and then a little
more and a little more until eventually I had effectively relearned how to sit
in a public space and just enjoy myself. I also watched videos from my
deployment experiences over and over and over again I listened and watched
until those memories no longer generated panic, anxiety, and discomfort. As
awkward as it is to say, part of the trauma of war seems to be giving war up
itself. Watching these videos and training my mind repeatedly was very similar
to the training I received in basic training to enable me to kill without a
second thought. I processed my memories so much that thinking of those
experiences became a deep breath of air and reassuring myself that everything
was fine. This is very different than erasing a memory, I will always remember
the traumatic experiences that I have been subjected to, but with enough
practice those memories are no longer as raw or painful as they once were.
One
of the problems is that soldiers are taught that everything can kill them, then
deploy and find that to be true. This creates a mindset that isn’t easily
changed once returning back to the United States and civilian life. The way I
have heard many veterans describe this, is like a switch that the military
expects us to be able to turn on when deployed and turn off when returning
home. The heightened sense of awareness and caution which lead soldiers to
question every person, vehicle, piece of trash on the side of the road and so
on doesn’t turn off when coming home leading many soldiers into a difficult
daily life where normal functionality and interactions with every day citizens
doesn’t take place because of fear. Sebastian Junger, war journalist and author
of War and co-director of the film Restrepo
talks about the struggles of soldiers returning home. Junger says that even as
complicated as life may seem and look from the outside looking in, life is
simple in war; there’s the enemy and then there’s your friends. Junger goes on
to say that at OP (out post) Restrepo from the documentary Restrepo in Afghanistan where he was embedded with a group of
soldiers, they knew who was on their side and they knew who the enemy was, and
knew who loved them and they knew who didn’t (Restrepo). I found this to be
spot on from my experience in Afghanistan as well. Often soldiers don’t trust
civilians for help, but what we must recognize is that we aren’t looking for
training to close within and destroy the enemy any longer. What veterans who
suffer from PTSD need to seek out now is training on how to come home. The
military should take the time when soldiers return home from overseas to place
them in treatment that is mandatory. Expecting soldiers with mental or
behavioral health issues to step forward on their own is unrealistic.
Especially when there are often consequences for their career progression in
the military. There needs to be better policy in the military and more actual
acceptance for its existence. The training and therapy of returning home should
be just as much involved and planned if not more than that of the training in
preparation to deploy. Coming home is often more difficult than going to war. If
we as a country want to set soldiers up for success, we need to not only train
them to fight but also train them to come home.
Works
Cited
Garcia, A Hector., McGeary, A Cindy.,
Finley, P Erin., Ketchum, S Norma., McGeary, D Donald., Petterson, L Alan.
“Evidence-Based Treatments for PTSD and VHA Provider Burnout: The Impact of
Cognitive Processing and Prolonged Exposure Therapies.” November 3, 2014. Web. https://www.researchgate.net/publication/273895929_Evidence-based_treatments_for_PTSD_and_VHA_provider_burnout_The_impact_of_cognitive_processing_and_prolonged_exposure_therapies
Garcia, A Hector. “We Train Soldiers
for War. Let’s Train Them to Come Home, Too” Ted Talks. (December 6, 2016). https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZnC_UBmeRxw
Junger, Sabastian. Tribe, Twelve, May 2016.
Oppel Jr. A Richard and Goodnough,
Abby. “Doctor Shortage Is Cited in Delays at V.A. Hospitals.” NY Times. May 29, 2014. Web. https://www.nytimes.com/2014/05/30/us/doctor-shortages-cited-in-va-hospital-waits.html
Reisman, Miriam. “PTSD Treatment for
Veterans: What’s Working, What’s New, and What’s Next.” Pharmacy and
Therapeutics. October 2016. Web. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5047000/
Restrepo (USA: Sebastian Junger and
Tim Hetherington, 2010)
Shane III, Leo and Kime, Patricia. “New
VA Study Finds 20 Veterans Commit Suicide Each Day.” Military Times. July 7, 2016. Web. https://www.militarytimes.com/veterans/2016/07/07/new-va-study-finds-20-veterans-commit-suicide-each-day/
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